I survived Sexual Child Abuse by Forgiving

I survived Sexual Child Abuse
I do not remember my childhood.  My family does not believe me.  They think that I am making it up to get attention.  My grandfather sexually abused me from the time my mother handed me over to him, as if I was a sacrfice for the family.  My mother knew what she was doing, when she forced me down the grey painted concrete steps that led to the dark damp basement, where no one could hear my screams or just ignored them.

This is a picture of me.  I look like any normal child, but I was being molested by my grandfather on a regular  basis.  Because of this I have developed an eating disorder since grade school.  I still have food issues to this day.  I abuse alcohol and have cut myself for years.  I am OCD, have panic attacks and can not be around people.  I have been suicidal most of my life.  I am a mess,

Until I met Jesus

How I learned to move on  In Print and E-Book

I will say, this is a process.  For me nothing happened overnight.  Once I learned the Love of GOD and what Jesus did for me at the Cross, I knew I have never been alone and that GOD Loved me before the creation of the world.

Jesus is the reason I am still alive.  Jesus Is why I can talk about my past.  Jesus is why I have forgiven my family, even though they don't deserve to be forgiven.

GOD has forgiven me, even though I don't deserve it.

If GOD can forgive me.....Then I can forgive my family.

I have forgiven my family but that does not mean that I have to see them or talk to them.  I forgave them, and moved on.

It is not easy.  The pain and hurt may never leave, but least now I know Jesus and that GOD created me for a reason and a purpose.  

So whatever you are going through or what went on in your past.  Forgive, is the first step to getting on with your life.  If you do not forgive, you will be stuck in the past, in emotional pain, being mad all the time, and wanting revenge on people that have done you wrong.

Once you forgive, you will have a weight lifted off your shoulders. and feel free of that burden.

You do not have to forgive in person.  I did not.  I wrote each family member a letter and then I prayed this:

Dear Lord,

I know that you sent Jesus so all my sins could be forgiven.  Jesus died on the Cross for me.  My sins are forgiven because of Jesus.  Lord, if you can forgive me, I can forgive whoever has done me wrong.

So I forgive ___________________  and whoever else has done me wrong.  In Jesus's Name, Amen.

I now forgive everyone.  When I pray, I forgive if I have ought againest anyone.  

So if you want GOD to move in your life....Forgive and let the Love of GOD flow in your life.